Tuesday, September 1, 2009

The First Kiss

How can anyone, guy or girl, reach the age of 31 and not know how to kiss? I'm truly stumped by this question. I understand that not everyone is necessarily "popular," but we all find our place in a social circle and it would seem logical that from the age of 14 or so you'd get SOME type of practice - even if it's always while drunk.

In any case, I had a date last night at Sequoia with a guy I'd met two weeks before at Sign of the Whale. I wouldn't say I was dying to see this guy again, but he'd been pretty persistent in asking me out and seemed excited about taking me to dinner. Why turn down a good meal?

We met at the front door and while the food was good, it was obvious in about 20 minutes that I would not be going out with him again. He's a very nice guy, we just weren't really clicking. I figured we'd enjoy dinner, go our separate ways, and that would be that.

Unfortunately, I was wrong.

Since it was a gorgeous night, he wanted to walk by the waterfront after dinner. As I had no interest in prolonging the evening, I steered him instead toward my car so we could say good night. I take my personal bubble pretty seriously, and unless I really like a guy, do not invite him into my space. Keeping a good distance between us, I thanked him for dinner - and he took this as his cue to grab my chin and invade my mouth!

We're talking full tongue on tongue action for a good 45 seconds - even though I tried to pull away twice! And the kiss was NOT good. In fact, it was my worst kiss ever - I never judge a kisser by the first encounter, but this was soooo bad that even if I'd fallen madly in love with the guy, I would not have wanted to repeat the experience.

Just because a guy wants to drop $80 on dinner, does not mean I'm automatically going to make out with him. And that's what this was - there was no slow start with a grand finale, just full speed ahead from the start. As he walked away, I was furiously wiping my mouth and counting down the seconds until I could get to my toothbrush.

At least he didn't say he would call - let's hope he doesn't!

3 comments:

  1. eeewwww!!!! (I love that you've started this blog though -- how interesting:) )

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  2. Perhaps, it should be called the first and LAST kiss! I think you can tell everything about a man in how he kisses. I have dumped several based on the first and LAST kiss. Better luck next time :)

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  3. I almost threw up the bagel I had for breakfast!

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